How are YOU today?

A HEAVY WAGON was being dragged along a country lane by a team of Oxen.  The Axle-trees groaned and creaked terribly; whereupon the Oxen, turning round, thus addressed the wheels:  "Hullo there! why do you make so much noise? We bear all the labor, and we, not you, ought to cry out." 

Those who suffer most cry out the least.

When you originate a conversation what do you say? I make it a POINT to always say "HOW ARE YOU TODAY?" You never really know what someone else is going through, and while they may not reach out to tell you all that is on their plate, maybe it's because nobody has asked them today... My mornings always start off pretty rough, so when I roll out of bed the last thing I want to hear about is someone elses issues while I'm trying to get my day started.

 I know that I shouldn't quantify someone elses problems... but (I hate when I add a 'but' to something I say as it makes me seem as if I'm justifying my own stupidity... ehhh... I'll do it anyway) I get overly irritated when I'm putting my budget together, trying to figure out HOW on earth I'm going to be able to pay everything that I've GOT to pay, and  get a text about a dire emergency... The emergency? "I caught him CHEATING!!! AGAIN!!! I know I wont have sex with him, cook, clean, or suck him off.... BUT WHY WAS HE WITH HER??? SHE'S UGLY!!!"

Me= -_-

REALLY??? THIS is your BIGGEST problem??? Let me explain somethings about me before I go further...

I'm the edest of 5. At the ripe old age of 8, I learned that crack cocaine is a hell of a drug. Nevertheless I was more than determined to make sure that my siblings and I were never victims of that. Fast forward to today... My mom passed away a year ago... 15 months ago to be more exact. (June 25th, 2009. On the same day as Michael Jackson, so excuse me if I show little reaction to his passing on that date...)She left behind her then 12 year old daughter and 18 year old son in college. (my sisters were grown at that point, so not so much my responsibility) So, lil ol newly engaged, just found out I was pregnant, taking care of my daughter with little help from anyone else, was not given a choice but to raise another 2 children. I had to put my brother through college. I had to make sure my sister was still able to live a good life. How was I going to do this shit? With a closed mouth, a smiling face, and a lot of prayer... and thats what I did. No complaints.

In a nutshell... thats my past. So now we're here. Listening to someone complain about an "ugly" girl who her boyfriend slept with behind her back. While her parents take care of her... she has never worked hard a day in her life... and she has never had to suffer. Go without a meal. Go without a lights, gas, watch her parents walk the streets... or get hoed out by her dads crack dealers... not a day in her life has she had to wonder how she was going to feed her siblings... how she was going to slip some money out her parents pockets while they were passed out in a drunken/ high state so her sisters can be able to go on their field trip with the rest of their classmates. I'll bet my last dime today she never put on an oversized coat in the fall to wear to the mall so that she can fit some sweaters underneath so she can have nice clothes... I'll also bet that she never got teased about holes in her clothes or fighting off girls who would like nothing better than to cut all her hair off and permanently scar her face... I'm SURE she's never had these problems.

But this was her problem... and it was huge... And I have always given my word not to judge... so I sit there furstrated... Consoling her... Giving advice... With no complaints. And not a ONCE did she bother to say "But how are YOU today?"